Just like Spider-Man does, myeloma patients can find comfort in community
The lesson of 'Brand New Day' is that even superheroes shouldn't go it alone
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I sometimes find inspiration for this column in surprising places. Tonight, I found it at the movie theater, during a showing of “Spider-Man: Brand New Day.” If you know anything about Spider-Man, you probably know the lesson he learned from his late Uncle Ben: “With great power comes great responsibility.”
There’s a different lesson in this latest movie installment, though: Great responsibility is not a burden one must carry alone. Peter Parker can turn to others for help.
That’s an important lesson for anyone carrying a burden, including a multiple myeloma diagnosis. You need not carry it alone.
Your personal first responders
It’s natural to turn to your family and close friends for support. That’s what they’re there for, right? In those initial weeks and months after a diagnosis, many will bend over backward for you and your caregiver.
But myeloma is a marathon, not a sprint. It’s not over when you finish induction, get a stem cell transplant, or even go through CAR T-cell therapy. It’s not unusual to see some of those friends and relatives withdraw a bit as compassion fatigue sets in.
It’s also not unusual to find that the ones who stick around don’t quite understand what you’re going through, especially if they think you look healthy. They may not realize the truth of the old saying, “Looks can be deceiving.”
If that’s happening for you, it may be time to broaden your circle of support.
Finding your tribe
This is where support groups can be so helpful. My first one was not myeloma-specific. In fact, we didn’t really talk about cancer at all! It was a mall walking group run by the local cancer center. We’d meet at Starbucks and do a couple of circles around the mall. The ladies I walked with had different cancers than mine and showed me how possible it was to just do normal things even during treatment.
I also found several support groups on Facebook, and I moderate one to this day. In the beginning, they were places for me to learn. Now it’s a chance for me to share experiences and to let new patients know someone sees them.
If you prefer in-person support, the Multiple Myeloma Research Foundation and the International Myeloma Foundation (IMF) both offer support groups. You can find the myeloma tribe at community workshops and seminars. The IMF is holding one this weekend, Aug. 14-15, in Los Angeles. I’ll be there to learn what’s new and simply hang out with my tribe. If you go, please find me to say hello!
The last word
A final thought about the movie: Peter realizes being a hero can be scary, maybe even scarier than he can imagine, but he doesn’t have to face it alone.
Myeloma is scary. But we don’t have to face it alone either.
Note: Rare Cancer News is strictly a news and information website about the disease. It does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. This content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website. The opinions expressed in this column are not those of Rare Cancer News or its parent company, Bionews, and are intended to spark discussion about issues pertaining to rare cancer.
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